Seven Things You Wish Adele Brought Back (That Aren’t Joe Thomas)
Adele’s recent comeback is spreading like wildfire – she’s managed to bring old songs and singers back. This got Antonia thinking what else she could bring back.
Adele’s back then. Lionel Richie mash-ups and marching bands galore, she seamlessly glided back onto the world’s radar with a thirty second teaser advert which was spun into prime time X Factor broadcasting. No images, no dates or information, simply subtitles and her voice on her latest track, ‘Hello’. A publicity stunt that only Adele could pull off sent the Twittersphere into frenzy. After taking a hiatus from music following her delectable debut and (almost) equally amazing follow-up album, Adele thwarted herself back into the limelight and has since prompted R&B veteran, uncle Joe (Thomas) to return with his own rendition of ‘Hello’. A real comeback from the original ‘Hello’ MVP – Lionel Richie is even on the cards. Like, what superpowers does Adele possess? Anyway, this got me thinking. If I could ask her, what else would I request from her royal genie-ness.
- 1. Cousin Skeeter
I can’t be the only one who remembers the funniest, most troublesome puppet to grace our television screens. Skeeter was always up to mischief, running rings around his family and just generally being a nutter. We don’t need to talk about fact that he was a puppet and the rest of his family were actual humans, but could you imagine Skeeter, all grown up, doing a collaboration with Adele?
2. Nap and Milk Time
You know when you’re sat at your desk at school, work or college and you hit that post-lunch slump to reactivate your energy levels? Now cast your memory back to nursery days when you could keep going and going even after home time with alarming levels of hyperactivity. That is owed to the wonderfully essential part of your timetable: nap and milk time. Nap and milk time charged you up beyond your tiny frame.
3. The iPod Classic
I remember back in the day, I was repulsed by the size and aesthetic of the iPod classic, so when I turned 14 and my sister offered to buy me Apple’s answer to the Walkman, obviously I went for the sleek and compact silver 4th generation iPod Nano. A decision I now lament on, going into work, or on the Tube, listening to the same songs – the only songs available on offline mode from my Spotify account because my phone has hit full capacity. And I can’t delete any pictures because I’m too attached to let them go just yet – even though they’re all stored on my computer. It’s peak. If you know anyone who’s trying to get rid of a fully functioning iPod classic, let me know.
4. Dance Films
What happened to dance movies and dance breaks in music videos? The Step Up franchise, You Got Served, Save The Last Dance, Stomp The Yard, ugh the list could go on. Now all we have are Magic Mikes, Dance Flicks and infinite Bring It Ons. Gone are the days when you leave the cinema with the fire in your belly to start up the latest dance troupe that you know will win next year’s Britain’s Got Talent and show Diversity what’s really real.
5. Lucy Beale
For those of you who still don’t know who killed Lucy Beale on Good Friday last year, it was her little brother, Bobby. Bobby’s always had an evil glint in his eye and its been brewing since Ian went missing and was living pon the streets back in 2012. Seeing as characters seem to make a habit of coming back to life on Albert Square, I don’t think Adele would struggle with this one. Lucy needs to return so she can tell her truth and nip Bobby’s criminal tendencies in the bud. #FreeMax
6. Free Plastic Shopping Bags
Call me lazy, call me spoilt, call me the main reason for climate change, but I’m going to say what you’re all thinking when you forget to bring out your ‘bag for life’ on your food shop. I don’t want to pay to carry my shopping home with dignity. 5p a bag is really steep, and my surplus plastic bag stock is coming to an end.
7. Michael Jackson
This is a contentious one, I know. But if anyone could actually bring the King of Pop back, I’d put my money on Adele.
Here’s your daily reminder of the Rife Guide
If you can think of any other things Adele could bring back, share them with us @RifeMag onTwitter.
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